Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Brief update and so long...

Things are progressing nicely. I am 13w4d so officially into the second trimester!
I feel great! I think I had some weird hormonal things going on during first tri- not depression, but just cloudy- if that makes sense?!?- With all of the anxiety I guess I just wasn't as excited as I should have been. I don't know how to explain it.
But it seems the cloud has lifted with the beginning of the second tri and all is great!

I probably won't be blogging much more- this blog was about my "quest" to become pregnant and I have (finally) achieved that.

At this point I don't feel like I want to start a new one about the pregnancy or life after it- but I may at some point in the future.

I guess the time as come to say "so long" to Christy's Quest.

Good luck to anyone that reads this blog on your own Quest!

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Everything appears to be ok

Had follow up u/s last week. Baby is still measuring small but it has grown the proper amount in that week. Its sweet little heartrate was 140, RE said anything over 120 was good RE is pleased and is releasing me to OB. I go in to see OB on Thursday so hopefully from here on out this is a very smooth-sailing pregnancy!!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

U/S update-

Good news: One baby, one heartbeat, good place in the uterus

Not so good news: Measuring 3 days smaller then should be. RE said this is right on the cusp of normal so I go back in one week to monitor growth. He can't tell at this point if it is behind because it is just a little slow or if it is because it is stopping- but we should be able to tell next week- so here we go again---waiting...

I am concerned because with the "slower" beta and now the "slower" growth things don't seem to be stacked in my favor.

This just doesn't seem fair-- why can't anything be easy with this pregnancy??

Well I am going to worry about it today only and then turn it over to God. This little punkin is a FIGHTER and I need to have faith in it and in God! That is all I can do!!!


U/S is in one hour... I have been so calm up to this point about the u/s and the beta numbers but now I am so nervous I could throw up...
I have been pregnant for 3 weeks now--I hope I am still pregnant after the appointment. I am so worried there isn't going to be a heartbeat or it isn't growing properly or whatever--- so many things to worry about!

Please oh please let everything be ok.

I am taking my Mom with me for moral support-Jason can't go as he is out of town...

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Snow in Dallas

Well- if you really want to call it that. It was more like ice but when we woke up this morning there it was on our cars and grass and roof. It didn't even stick enough to make schools open late, but it was still fun for Garrett to see it.

He made a snowball and threw it and he ate some of it. Here is a picture of his first snowball (maybe if I can figure out how to do it)

Friday, February 29, 2008

Finally over the FLU

Wow- it has been about 10 days getting over this flu- It SUCKED! Finally today I can breathe and I actually want to eat. I guess because I have been so congested that the thought of eating made me want to gag. Mostly it was bread type stuff and anything that was dry. Of course I forced myself to eat because of lil pumpkin but everything just tasted horrible. Today I am going to Pei Wei for lunch and get something spicy to try to clear out the last bit of congestion.

Not much going on in the way of symptoms...BBs are a little sore, not too bad.
I think Jason would say that I have been a little moodier :).
I am definetly more tired in the evenings but I can't tell if that is because of lil pumpkin or just from being sick. Probably a combination of both.
The main thing that sticks out is THIRST! I remember being thirsty with Garrett, but I can't remember if it was this bad. I guess that is my body's way of staying hydrated!

I am not thinking about the "slower" beta. I am just going on with life as if I never had that result and that everything is just fine. I am enjoying every moment of this pregnancy. It took so long for us to get here and this will (probably) be my last pregnancy so I am just savoring every moment and not letting worry get to me.
I really do believe deep down that it is going to be ok. Can't wait to see the lil pumpkin on the 12th during the ultrasound though-just to make sure!

I bought a pregnancy journal this past weekend-it has places in it to record your weight and waist size throughout the pregnancy. I measured my waist and then got curious what my waist size was with Garrett. So I opened up the journal that I kept when pregnant with him to compare the sizes. I WAS 5 MONTHS PREGNANT before my waist was the size it is now. GEEZ, can you say I have put on a few pounds...In fact at my current weight I am only 5 lbs. less than I was when I GAVE BIRTH last time. Granted I only gained 20lbs with Garrett, but still I am 15lbs heavier going into this pregnancy than I was last time. Kind of depressing- but oh well- I can worry about it after lil pumpkin has made its debut in October...

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Beta #2

Well the results are in:

Good but not doubling every 48 hrs. more like 54 hours. Everything I have read says as long as it is 48-72 hours it is fine. Dr didn't seem too concerned. They did not order a repeat beta just scheduled me to come in a few days early for my u/s.

I am trying not to read too much into this- I really do believe it is fine- but just having that tiny bit of doubt sucks! And u/s isn't for 2 more weeks so here we go back to the 2 week wait...

Monday, February 25, 2008

No sticks to pee on

Well today is the first day since last Monday that I haven't peed on a stick. I am out of pg tests. I had an OPK that I thought about peeing on because I have heard about people using them as pg tests. But then I decided not to because they do not even measure the same hormone so why would someone use them as a pg test?! I might do it tomorrow just to see what happens.

I tried to buy more pg tests yesterday but Jason told me NO!! I had already used 8 and gotten the results of my Beta- I am indeed pregnant! But I still want the satisfaction of seeing those 2 beautiful lines.

Maybe I will go buy one today that says "pregnant"- just so I can take a picture to put in the baby book.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Beta #1

Well the nurse called today (Sunday) and told me that my beta was 114 Yea!! Progesterone and Estrogen were normal also
We were at a restaurant having breakfast when she called and I started crying, what a relief
I asked about the spotting and she said it was normal and not to worry about it unless it starts coming out like a period (yeah right, how can I not worry)
So once again I am cautiously optomistic. Beta #2 is on Tuesday. We will see what Tuesday brings.

I just HATE this spotting!!

Saturday, February 23, 2008

blood test, spotting, flu etc...

Well I had my blood test yesterday and I am not going to get the results back until Monday- ARG!! That wouldn't have been a big deal since the HPT are getting darker, but I have started spotting. Started spotting yesterday. I called the Dr office and the nurse asked me what color it was and it was (is) pink and she said that is normal.
Of course I have googled and have found many stories where women spotted and have normal pregnancies and just as many that don't. So I don't know, I am thinking this is not a good thing since I always spot before I get AF. I guess we will know more on Monday when I get the results back.
It just sucks to have gone through all of this-all of the shots, ultrasounds, blood draws, medications etc., and it not work. I would have rather had negative HPT then to have postive ones and then something happen to it.

Also I have the flu-I went to the doc yesterday and because I was (am) pregnant I can't take tamiflu so I have to just suffer through it. I am feeling much better today though, I think my fever broke yesterday so if I could just get rid of all the congestion I would be better.

I guess we will see what the results are on Monday but I am not holding on to much hope for this pregnancy to stick.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008


I have tested two more times since my last post. One yesterday afternoon after holding my pee for 5 hours and the line was there, very faint but there.

So I was able to tell Jason the way I had wanted to. I bought an anniversary card and in the card I wrote the poem that I blogged about yesterday. He looked up and said "what does this mean?" Of course I was crying already and so he knew. He started crying and gave me a big hug. What a great anniversary!

Then I couldn't sleep so I got up at 4am and tested and the line was there and DARKER! So I am very cautiously optomistic!!!

We will see what Beta holds for us on Friday, hopefully HIGH numbers...

I am the crabbiest, moodiest person in the world right now. Everything makes me want to either cry or tear someone's head off. I keep telling myself that it is because I have a crazy amount of hormones flying around in my body right now!

Anyway I am happy and very thankful that I found the insurance to cover the IVF--because without it I probably wouldn't be pg!! What a roller coaster!

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Funny thing about the hpt this morning

I can't find it...
Of course I was carrying it through the house looking at it in different lights (as all of us poas-aholics do) and I think I set it down somewhere and I can't remember for the life of me...

It is not in the trash, I went through it (gross) and I have searched everywhere.

Funny part is that we have a babysitter coming tonight and I am worried that she is going to find it somewhere random-like in the fridge or something--who knows.

At least that will add a little humor about the situation...

Is it a line?!?

Well I tested again this morning because I thought it would be really cool to tell Jason tonight when we are at dinner for our anniversary--8 yrs--.

I THINK I saw something on an internet cheapie... it was oh so light, maybe an evaporation line--I just don't know?!? But it was enough to restore my hope. I am going to buy a FRER tonight and test again before we go out to dinner. I have dreamed up this fun way to tell Jason if it is bfp. I am going to get him an anniversary card and give it to him at dinner. In the card I will write this little poem I made up... at the end of the poem it says:

"I am going to tell you a secret that only you and I know, but we have to tell people before I start to show.
Yes that's right, Garrett's going to be a big brother, our time has finally come to have another"

I know I am not the world's best poet-- ha! but I think it is a cute way to tell him
I hope and pray that I can spill the beans tonight!

Now I am off to research evaporation lines...

Monday, February 18, 2008

Well I tested


I know it is really early 5dp5dt but that equals out to 10dpo- so I thought maybe.
Strangely I am not that upset by it-I guess because it is still early and there is still a chance.

Not feeling any symptoms AT ALL, boobs aren't even sore anymore.
I am not holding out much hope for this cycle working. I am already thinking about next cycle. Not very positive thinking I know-but that is how I feel.

Anyway I have to day off of work today so I am going to enjoy the beautiful weather and hang out with Garrett-he always makes me smile!

Friday, February 15, 2008

one week wait

Well-I am down to the one week wait- Beta is one week from today...

It is so weird that during IVF the embryos are not even inside of you for part of the two week wait. Two week wait starts at retrieval so for 3-5 days you are "in" the two week wait, but you KNOW that you have nothing growing inside of you.

So technically I only have a "9 day wait" this cycle (the time from transfer to beta). Still it is going by so slowly though!

PIO shots are starting to hurt. They didn't hurt the first couple of days, but now they are. Wonder why?? I guess because we are running out of room on the fat places of my bum :)

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Transfer complete--PUPO

Well transfer is complete and I am finally off the 24 hr bedrest. That was the worst part, I am not a bed rest type of girl so I was really ready to get out of the house this afternoon.

Transfer was easy- tranferred two very good quality blasts so now we wait...
Beta is scheduled for next Friday (22nd), but I am pretty certain I will test before then--just can't decide when...maybe on the 19th that is my 8th anniversary so that would be a cool anniversary present-but on the other hand it would make me really sad if it was neg.

Of course I have "googled" when other people test and some get bfp 4 or 5 days after 5dt. The 19th would be 6dpt so maybe it would show up?!? Decisions, Decisions...

Monday, February 11, 2008

ET rescheduled

Well, well-- the kiddos are growing so well they have rescheduled me to Wednesday, which will be a 5 day transfer
We have 2 at 10 cells, 2 at 8 cells and one poor little one at 2 cells.
At this point they should be at 8 cells so we have four that are EXCELLENT!!

I am so relieved-I know that many many people get pg with a 3dt, I researched it alot this weekend- but for me I really wanted to try to grow them out to 5 day so that we could pick the strongest- and yea!! we get to wait until 5 day

Also I have this major issue at work- I made a HUGE mistake that needs to be dealt with asap and now this gives me time to deal with it. I am very thankful because I have been VERY stressed about it and I was worried that the stress might harm the eggies. Now I have time to deal with it today and tomorrow and then I can (hopefully) be stress free on Wednesday and Thursday.

I dealt with the issue at work- turns out it isn't my fault AT ALL and that there isn't even an issue-just an oversight on someone else's part that made me look very bad. But once the mistake of the other person is corrected then everything is fine.
THANK GOODNESS!!! I guess I should have dealt with it last week and then I wouldn't have spent the whole weekend worrying about it.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

I have 5 children growing in a petri dish

That is weird!! Five of Eight eggs fertilized. Not bad I suppose.
I guess because we have "fewer" eggs, RE and embryologist decided to do a 3 day transfer- so transfer is on Monday at 12:15- then bedrest for 24 hours and then back to business as usual.

I am NOT going to obsess about symptoms this time since I know that the PIO causes them-

I am sure I will POAS before beta- well for sure I want to do it that morning bc I would rather find out that way if it is negative then by a nurse calling me.
But when will I start POAS??? I don't know- I want to wait as long as possible--maybe (doubtfully) I will hold out until beta day on the 22nd. Whew- that is a LONG time away!!

Well I am off to enjoy the beautiful weather-- it is probably 80 degrees today--

Keeping fingers and toes crossed that we have some great embies on Monday

Friday, February 8, 2008

More on the rabbits from this morning

OK- so of course I am sitting here, bored at work and decide to start researching rabbits and what they represent.
Turns out they represent FERTILITY-- Read this from wikipedia:

A fertility symbol is an object used by early historical human societies representing fertility. These symbols took on several different forms.
For example, some fertility symbols took on the appearance of a rotund human female as obesity was seen as attractive in times when food was scarce. Also, certain animals that reproduce often have been viewed as fertility symbols, such as frogs and rabbits.

And from another website:

Because of its fertility (one doe can produce 42 young a year), the rabbit or hare is an emblem of fertility, abundance, good fortune, sexuality, lasciviousness, lust, procreation, puberty, renewal, spring, rampant growth, excess, and love gods and goddesses such as Venus, Aphrodite, and Cupid. Pliny the Elder even prescribed its meat as a cure for female sterility.

I am freaking out!! I totally believe in signs and I hope seeing the two rabbits this morning was a sign of good things to come!!

ER completed

ER is complete-- 9 follies going into it and got 8 eggs so I am pleased.
Of course we won't know how many were mature or how many fertilized until tomorrow- hopefully ALL of them did.

The procedure was really easy, I am actually back at work already.

One thing funny (and a bit embarrassing) happened: Jason told me as I was waking up in my recovery room- I told the Dr "don't worry, I have been like this before although usually it is alcohol induced"-- I am embarrassed to have to see him in a few days. But I am sure he has heard worse.

So now we wait...fert report tomorrow and then the decision to do 3 or 5 day transfer.

Oh- as we were walking into the clinic we saw 2 little bunnies hopping around- I take this as a good sign since we all know easily rabbits reproduce:)

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

ER is scheduled

We are set for Friday!! Of course this is the WORST possible day it could have happened work-wise for Jason and myself- but I am not going to worry about it at this point- nothing I can do and I can't change it so why worry?!? I just hope we both have a job after :)

Anyway lining is 9mm. Ten follies ranging from 22mm down to 7mm. Obviously the smaller ones won't mature. The nurse said she thought we were looking at having 6-7 mature ones. So that is good, gives us a few to work with.

The best part is NO MORE REPRONEX (hopefully forever). My skin and that medication did not like each other AT ALL! My stomach looks like I have huge hives all over it. It is pretty gross looking-but hopefully all of the redness and swelling will go down since I am finished with it.

I do trigger tonight (not sure about time yet) and then go in Friday morning for ER.
3-5 days later is ET.

The nurse drew big bulls eyes on my booty to give us a target for the progesterone shots-- ha ha! Jason should have fun with that.

UPDATE: ER is scheduled for 7:30am on Friday

One more thought- I just went back and looked at all of the predictions I have gotten over the past. One of the (Cheri-from Web MD) predicted February and Girl-yippee! Please oh please let her be right!!!

Monday, February 4, 2008

U/S update

Had another appointment with the cooter cam this morning (that is what DH and I have decided to start calling the u/s wand) and I have another late follie that decided to show up-- yea!!!

So I had 9 follies ranging from 17mm to 11mm and lining was at 8. I am pleased that a new one decided to pop up!!

Had blood drawn as well and am waiting the call from the Dr. about whether or not to adjust meds. I have now added in a 3rd shot called Ganirelix. This prevents premature ovulation.

I think ER will probably be Thurs or Friday. I am getting nervous about work- I haven't exactly told my boss everything that is going on- I have told her that I am seeing an RE and that I am taking large doses of hormones to try to produce many eggs. But I haven't told her about doing IVf and the time off I will need for ET/ER She is planning on being off on Friday and so I am going to have to fake a sick day. She and I really shouldn't be out on the same day... but I really don't have a choice if ER ends up being on Friday. Then to top it off we have numerous closings that are supposed to take place next week--when I will need off 2 days for ET. Hopefully those won't close though...

On another note we had fun at my friend's house watching the Superbowl. It was nice to get out and around friends. We have been staying home alot because going out with friends usually involves drinking and since I am not drinking being around drunk people isn't as much fun. But it was great to see everyone and it was great to wake up this morning with NO HANGOVER!! What a great game-- I wanted the Giants to win- mostly because they were the underdog.

Just heard from the Dr. office. I am to stay on the same dosage of Follistim and Repronex, but up the dose from 1/2 to whole of the Ganirelix. (This is probably to slow the 17mm follie down so the others can catch up). Go back in on Wed for cooter cam and bloodwork. I guess I find out then whether ER will be on Friday or over the weekend...

Friday, February 1, 2008

First Follie check

Had my first follie check yesterday. I had four on the right ranging from 7.5mm to 5.5mm and four on the left ranging from 9mm to 7mm. So eight total so far, ultrasound tech said more may pop up, they may just be too small to see at this point.

So I am to continue the same amount of meds and go back tomorrow for another check.

I was a bit discouraged at only having 8, but I am very happy to have those 8. Some women only get 2 or 3- so I think 8 is a great start!! But hopefully there will be a few more in there tomorrow.

The nurse said we are looking good as long as they all stay together around the same size.

More tomorrow...

Monday, January 28, 2008

Started Stims

I started this whole crazy process last night.
300 units of Follistim (easy, this is what I was on last time) and
150 IU of Repronex (OUCH- I have a huge red welt on my stomach from this)-- not looking forward to 10 days of this.
Maybe I will stim fast and I won't have to do it for 10 days.

Gotta keep my eye on the prize.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Let the games begin

So I took my last BCP last night and go to the Dr. tomorrow for b/w and u/s. They will give me the injectible schedule at that point.

I am glad to be off the pill, I think it has made me really emotional. I felt depressed almost yesterday and again today. Has to be the pill.

I am sure the huge doses of hormones that I am about to inject myself with are not going to help with the emotions. But I just have to get through the next few weeks and will hopefully be pregnant. Gotta keep my eye on the prize!!

We had our IVF orientation at the hospital last night. Some of the questions people asked amazed me. I don't know how people got this far into IVF without knowing that information. I feel very well informed, but I do alot of research on it- I guess some people don't-

Anyway more news tomorrow after the Dr. appt. Ready to get this ball rollin!!

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

More good news

What a great week this has been!! First we get approved to go ahead and to IVF and then today DH just got a pretty significant raise and he got promoted to manager.

He does leasing for an oil and gas company-- well today two different managers asked that he be moved over to their team because he was such an asset.

The main manager decided since he was so "sought after" that he should get a promotion so he got promoted to manager. He has his own crew that will work under him now.

This is amazing since he has only been doing this for 1 year. Just proves that hard work DOES pay off!

We have had such a good week this week, I hope the good news continues to roll in!!

Wow- starting IVF

I can't believe this!! Monday when AF showed I got a call from my insurance that I did not have to do another IUI cycle- I could move on to IVF if I wanted to.

So I called Jason to make sure that we had the money at the moment to cover the medicine. He said "Call the Dr and get going- I will find the money." (very sweet)

Anyway I called the RE to see if I could start this cycle and he said yes-

So I have started BCP, will be on them for 10 days. Go in for u/s on Jan. 25 and then I guess start stims at that point. Dr. said about 10 days of stims, then trigger shot. 36 hours later Egg retrieval and 5 days later transfer them back in.

He will put back in two embryos, so there is a possibility of twins-- but we will just cross that bridge when we come to it. At this point I am taking things day to day because I know once I start the stim shots it is going to fly by (until the 2ww)

OMG- I am overwhelmed!! I am very excited but nervous as well. I can't believe I have gotten to this point. I never thought this would happen, well it wouldn't have had I not checked and re-checked for the IVF coverage.

I have had a feeling all along that the second cycle with this RE will be the lucky one-and this is the second cycle. Hopefully my intuition is right!!

Monday, January 14, 2008


This was not our lucky month. AF came today-right on time.

Onto inj/IUI cycle number two. I have sent in all of the paper work to get approved for IVF- so hopefully if this isn't our lucky cycle things will be in order and we can get started on IVF in mid-Feb.

I never in a million years would have thought I would be facing IVF in a month.
Well actually I never would be doing it had we not gotten the insurance coverage that we did- I am very lucky to have such coverage!!

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Insurance calculations

Here is an example of how screwed up the whole health care/insurance industry is.

I went through and added up all of my claims on my insurance for IF related stuff.
The grand total that the insurance has been charged (or what I would have been charged had I not had insurance) is $15,188.95. WOW

The total they have actually paid (since they have agreed prices with the Dr.) is $6276.93.

That is less that half of what I would have paid had I been self pay.

I think that is so unfair. I mean the people without insurance usually can not afford insurance yet they are being charged the most for the services that they are receiving.

And another thing that really upsets me about insurance, at least here in Texas, is that none of the private policies really cover maternity. Meaning if I am self-employed and just pay my insurance privately, maternity will be MINIMALLY covered at best. Hopefully things have changed since I was looking into it 4+ years ago, but back then there was ONE company that covered maternity and that was if you had been with them a year and only up to $3000. THAT IS IT. So I guess mid-income self employed women either have to pay their own pre-natal care or they just don't get it.
We had to pay for our own care, even though we had insurance. The policy didn't cover maternity.

I don't know what the answer is to fix the problem, but something needs to be done about it. I hope whoever gets elected President will be able to, at least, get a plan started to turn this around.

I just don't understand...

Halfway through the 2WT

We are half way there. I went in this morning for Estrogen and Progesterone tests. They said they would call me if I needed to increase or decrease meds. If I heard nothing from them everything was fine.

I kinda wanted to know the numbers but I do know that they will be skewed because I am on supplements and I do know that even if they are high it doesn't mean that I am pg. So I guess it is best for me not to know- one less thing to stress about right?!?

They said to take a pg test on the 14th and call them if positive. If negative stop meds and call them on cd 1. I expected that they would want to do a beta either way, but at least this way is saving me the $30 copay I guess.

Monday is so far away...

The inlaws are coming this weekend to visit so at least it will be a busy weekend to keep my mind off of it.

Will I test before Monday?? Probably! It would be fun to tell both sets of Grandparents on Sat night when we all go out to dinner. Maybe, just maybe that will happen.

We have our fingers crossed...

Friday, January 4, 2008

Funny thought

I was just reading on an IF support group. A girl on there was asking all kinds of questions about her DH having to give a "sample". She was embarrassed and said he was embarrassed...

So the other ladies on there were giving her support and telling her it wasn't that bad and some things to bring to make it easier for him to "perform"

One of the suggestions was a LAMP in case the room didn't have soft lighting.
A lamp? Really?
Can you see a man sitting in the waiting room with a lamp?

I really got a kick out of that response. I wonder if he brought a lamp with him??!!